Overheard

Posted: December 23rd, 2009 | Author: Dave | Filed under: Toddlers | No Comments »

Part 1: Overheard at the Harley Davidson Dealership

William: That’s a motorcycle!
Me: Yes.
William: It’s cool!
Me: Yes.
William:…and pretty.
Me: No. No, no no. No.

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Part 2: Overheard from the booster seat

William, upon noticing his runny nose: My nose is coming down.

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Part 3: Overheard at breakfast

Grace: Oh, it died.
Me: It “died”?
Grace: Yes.
Me: What died?
Grace: The butter.
Me: The butter died.
Grace: Yes. You need to put more.
Me: On top of your dead butter.
Grace: Yes.
Me: Um, Okay.

Part 4: Overheard on the couch

Me: When can I have a day when I sleep as late as I want and then do whatever I want?
My wife: In about fifteen years.
Me: Right.

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Part 5: Overheard from the playroom

Grace: Dad, I’m almost making a beautiful picture.

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Part 6: Overheard in the yard

Grace: Oh, no! My tie came unshoed!

———-

Part 7: Overheard while browsing photos

Me: Look at these new pictures of William
My wife: God, he’s so frickin’ cute.
Me: Yeah. He looks so grown up.
My wife: Don’t you think he’s especially good looking?
Me: Well, of course. But, I’m his father, so…
My wife: No, I mean he’s really amazingly beautiful. When we’re at the playground, with the ugly children…
Me: UGLY CHILDREN?!?
My wife: What? I said “other children.”
Me: No, you totally said “ugly children.”
My wife: No, I did not.

Oh, yes she absolutely did.

———-

Part 8: Overheard outside

William, upon noticing fast-moving clouds:“The sky is moving!”

———-

Part 9: Overheard amid a pile of princess toys

William, after putting on his Batman sunglasses:

“Grace, do I look black?”

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Part 10: Overheard from my own mouth:

“Honey, don’t clean that with toast.”

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Part 11: Overheard while watching Zaboomafoo:

Grace: “When a turtle makes an egg, it poops it out.”

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Part 12: Overheard from Grace

“Daddy, make a silly joke today…PLEASE!”

———-

Part 13: Overheard while coloring.

Me: “Oh, William! That’s pretty!”
William: “It’s not pretty! It’s orange!”

———-

Part 14: Overheard at preschool:

Teacher: “Do you like the Red Sox?”
Grace: “I don’t have any red socks.”

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